JOURNAL FROM AUSTRALIA - 7 MONTHS

7 months in here, and I´ve been thinking of my family and my home, everyday.

Nowadays, I´ve been feeling a little bit strange.

I´ve said goodbye for many people whose are leaving Sydney for many reasons, wick make me think about myself.

What´s my limit?

Whays my "I´m done" or "I give up"?

I´ve been juggling with so many things such as: my son in Brazil, alone ( I wonder if he will forget me), I have a rented apartment in BR, I have a love there, I have to save money to keep me here and to help my son, I have my saving going dow with Brazilian´s bills, I have pain in my back wich put a limit in my body.

I don't feel enough confident with my English, with my vocabulary. I need to work more than 24 hours per week to get enough or adequate money to survive here.

I don't have money to buy things... things that I used to buy.

I´ve been listenning so many podcasts and TedTalks to practice my listenning and it´s drives me crazy.

Ive got doubts. Imnot interest in now going back to Brazil to do the same thing,, the same work, even the same life.

I ahve changed different y mind about everything and I dont know how cope eith these all changes. I just fell in and recognize that my life should be different to used to be.

I miss everybody in my country but I need to do what I promised to myself.

I'm afraid again.

There goes the fear again. There´s no end. There is always fear and courage. I'm afraid of going back and facing the same thing, the same life, the same routine.

I’m keen to start another chapter of my life. I reckon that my life should be more than work and paying bills. Even here.

I believe that I'm pushing myseld to know other world, options, lifestyles, other places, other people, cultures and lives.

I'm looking forward to seeing my next chapter, wich I don't know when and how starts but I´ve got a feeling and specially aim that I’ll find what I'm looking for.